Wednesday, November 19, 2014

What About The Kids?

What About The Kids?

by Gabriella Pinto-Coelho

When addressing addiction and the process of recovery, most people only think about what the addict goes through. After what can be an emotionally draining detox process, they have the rest of their lives to manage recovery. What society often forgets in this picture of addiction, detox, and recovery is the role of the family. 

Perhaps most vulnerable to the peripheral effects of addiction are children. Kids of alcoholics often take on roles like “the hero” or the “scapegoat” in order to keep their family afloat. Some kids might choose to keep the substance abuse a secret in order to maintain their family’s image. 

School counselors in Frederick County, Maryland are no strangers to this concept. They have created Kids Like Us, a free program to meet the psychological needs of children growing up in homes with family members who have substance abuse problems. Guidance counselors refer students in the Frederick County public school system to the program, which appears to be just what the Frederick community needed. Julie Merchant, Director of KLU, says that they are “pretty much always filled to the capacity that we can handle.”

KLU allows students a place to talk about their struggles in a group, since students are more likely to open up to one another than to adults. As a condition of their participation, students agree to keep all discussions and names confidential. Targeting school-aged children is a smart choice, since fourth grade is when kids begin to understand the concept of addiction, and puberty is when their own risk for addiction rises. 

In addition to its function as a support group, KLU also educates children about substance abuse. They teach kids that addiction is a disease separate from the person that they love, and it is no one’s fault. They also empower kids to understand that substance abuse is preventable in their own lives, and they do not have to follow in the same path as their loved one.

To learn more about Kids Like Us, read the article here.

Monday, November 10, 2014

A Story of Perseverance and Determination That Will Inspire You to Take Action!

An Amazing Story of Determination that Will Inspire You to Take Action
by Steve Bloom of

Editor's Note:   Wanted to share an article about the kind of perseverance and determination we often witness from our patients and their families while in treatment at The Coleman Institute.

A few weeks ago, I watched a documentary about Hawaii – specifically about its history and culture.
It’s a good documentary overall, but the story about how Hawaii was discovered particularly caught my attention.  It is easily one of the greatest stories about perseverance and determination I’ve ever heard.
If you ever need an inspiring kick in the butt to reach your goals, this is it.
The Story of Perseverance and Determination
I’ve often heard that the only sure-fire way to fail is to give up.
It’s no secret that big goals take time.  You have to think months or even years down the road.  Because they take so much time, we’re often tempted to quit before reaching them.
This story will show why you shouldn’t easily give up.
Hawaii was discovered around AD 1000 – no one knows the exact date – by a group of seafaring Polynesians who inhabited and explored many of the islands in the South Pacific.
If you look at a map of the world, you’ll notice that Hawaii is one of the most isolated spots on the planet.  So it’s already incredible that it was discovered so early in human history.
But what they did to get there makes the story even more amazing.
Because of its isolation, they would never have known Hawaii was even there.
They suspected it was there though.  They noticed a bird called the Golden Plover which migrated north out into the open water every year.  Land must have been out there somewhere – they just couldn’t see it.
So they set sail from the Marquesas Island to follow them.  That island is as close as you can get to Hawaii, but it’s still about 2500 miles away.  Nowadays it takes roughly 30 days to sail to Hawaii from Marquesas using modern day equipment.
Back then, they were only using carved wooden boats and their own understanding of naval navigation.
The Polynesians followed the birds closely, but they always flew faster than they could paddle.  They could only keep up with them for short distances.
At some point, they would lose track and have to turn back.
Each year they would try again, picking up where they left off the previous year.  Years passed by and they kept getting farther into the Pacific.  But still they never saw land.
According to the documentary, it took the Polynesians 400 years to finally reach Hawaii using this method.
400 years!
Every time I hear the documentary say this number, I’m amazed.
Imagine the determination and perseverance you would need to do this.
After generations of hard work, belief, perseverance and determination – after years of uncertainty and doubt they finally reached their goal.
By this point, Hawaii might have become something like a mythical idea.  To actually reach it, must have brought many of the travelers to tears.
Inspire Yourself
That was almost 1000 years ago.  Yet their struggles relate a lot to our own goal-setting.
We’re all working towards an unknown destination just like the Polynesians.  The principles are exactly the same.
Your big goal is like Hawaii
After a lot of hard work and perseverance, the Polynesians reached the goal that took them years to accomplish.
There was no guarantee they’d reach it.  For all they knew, they were sailing out to nothing.
This is what goal setting is like.  You’re not completely certain it’s out there, but you work on the faith that you’ll reach it.  Sometimes you have to risk going out into nothing in order to get where you want to be.
Your clues to success are like the birds
The Polynesians saw the birds flying in the direction of Hawaii and deduced that land was there.  That was their clue that they’d eventually reach their destination.
We’re all setting big goals or dreams on a clue or a hunch that we’ll reach them.  It’s our determination and belief in those clues that keep us going.
Your obstacles are like the ocean
Reaching Hawaii meant paddling across 2500 miles through the Pacific.  Navigating over the open water and making sure their boat didn’t sink were huge obstacles.
All goals have obstacles to overcome.  We all have things standing in our way.  They can often seem insurmountable, but with enough perseverance we can usually get around them.
Don’t Stop Working Towards Your Goals
The big takeaway to this story is that you have to keep working towards your goals.  Determination and perseverance pay off.
That means working hard even if you don’t see an end in sight.
How often did the Polynesians stop at some random place in the middle of the Pacific and see nothing?
You’ll face that moment too while pursuing your goal.  You’ll stop to look around and see nothing.
That’s normal.
There will often be nothing to encourage us.
There will often be nothing telling us if our hunches are right.
The problem is that when we see nothing we might think there really is nothing.
We all get afraid that our goals won’t really be there.  We all feel like we’re working towards something that will never arrive.
You have to have faith that your “Hawaii” is out there.  You have to have faith that all your work will get you to your destination.
It often just takes time and small steps.  You have to persevere and see it all the way to the end.
Sailing too far away from the shore for so long can be scary, but it will get you places.

Sunday, November 2, 2014

Positive Effective Programming

Positive Effective Programming.

An article by:Fantastic Fred Schiavo

The P.E.P. Technique is used to program the subconscious mind. The subconscious works very much like a computer. In computer technology, whatever you program into the computer is what comes out. There is an old saying in computer technology, "Garbage in, garbage out." If you program garbage (negative information) into the computer, expect to get garbage (negative results). The subconscious mind accepts whatever you give it as being true. It doesn't have the capacity to question.

As you work with positive affirmations, you will notice positive changes taking place in your life. You will be aware that others will be drawn to your joyous, happy and loving spirit.

There are many negative words and statements that can easily be changed to positive ones. Is the word TRY a negative one? Webster says that try means "to make an effort," but I say that making an effort is not "doing it!" Consider changing the words "I'll Try" to "I Will"; change "I Hope" to "I Can"; and "I Can't" to "I Can."
About 20 years ago, every time someone would ask, "How are you?" I would answer with "FANTASTIC!" Finally a friend said "Fred, you can't be fantastic every day." I said, "You're right, some days I'm FANTASTIC!" and I bellowed that one out, "and other days I'm fantastic," saying this in a softer tone. "In conclusion," I said, "I'm fantastic every day."

If you act as if you have a quality, you will get it. If you think, talk and act FANTASTIC, you will be FANTASTIC. In other words, fake it 'til you make it! In my office, for all to see, sits a can. I call it the "eye can." It has eyes all around it and these eyes keep staring at me all day reminding me that I CAN. Whatever I choose to achieve in life, I CAN!

The P.E.P. Technique mentioned earlier must be used with the C.A.L.M. Method, which is a form of relaxation also tied to an acronym. This approach is used to relax the "critical faculty" of the conscious mind so that we can effectively program the subconscious.

The meaning of the letters in the C.A.L.M. Method are as follows:

C - stands for COMMITMENT.

Starting at once, make an agreement with yourself. You are now committed in your resolve to change.

A - stands for ATTITUDE.

Positive attracts positive and negative attracts negative. By thinking positive, acting positive and being positive, we attract positive.

L - stands for LOGIC.

Intellectually, we know what is right, but we refuse to look at the truth. We get into denial. Denial means to declare what is not true that which is really true.

M - stands for MOTIVATION.

What is your motivation to make a change in your life? Whenever I work with people privately to overcome bad habits, I ask that question. Their success is dependent on their answer. When the reasons for change are specific (e.g. "I want to quit smoking for health reasons.") people are usually more motivated, and the likelihood for success is more prominent.

You need to get past the feeling that it may be too late. The most important decision you can make is that there is still time to change your life. The decision is yours. Start today to program yourself in a positive, effective way.

This article is posted on The Real Jim Wilson blog .....Click here