Friday, November 2, 2012

Are You in Control?

Chris Newcomb, M.Div. 

One of the hardest tasks in recovery is to realize how much in life you can not control.  It is an often painful lesson.  Our delusions of grandeur make us believe we are in total control of life, other people, ourselves, and our addiction.  Keyword:  Delusion!

The reality is very few people, sober or substance abuser, is in control of life at any given point.  We are made of flesh and bone.  Mere mortals.  Finite.  Limited.  Bound by space and time and our inadequacies, selfish motives, and insecure personalities.  To be sure, many of us experience happy moments in our lives but most of us think if we could just get control of everything and everybody life would go so much better.  Hogwash!  Good luck with that.  Tell me how that works for you!

Radical acceptance includes the fact that we can only control certain things in life and it would behoove us to discern what that is so we can live a happy, productive, and healthy life.  It is easier said than done.  Letting go and only trying to change the things we can makes many of us feel powerless and limited.  NEWSFLASH:  WE ARE!  

Now before you get mad and think I am telling you to be lazy, unconfrontational, and weak; let me remind you that is NOT what I am saying.  I am saying be realistic.  Allow yourself to truly discern what you can and can't control.  And then live your life accordingly and see if it isn't a more manageable way of living life.  See if your anxiety doesn't go down.  Perhaps your blood pressure will too!

Today is a great day to start fresh and re-imagine your relationship with control.  Why not try something different?  If it doesn't work you can always go back to trying to control everything and everybody.  Just remember, that didn't work either!  

At The Coleman Institute, we specialize in helping people get clean clean and stay clean from alcohol and drugs.  We are in the business of helping our client's learn to live a balanced life free from the extremes of obsessive control and reckless abandon.  If you or someone you love is in need of detox from opiatesalcohol, benzos, Methadone, or Suboxone, please do not hesitant to call Jennifer Pius at 1-877-77-DETOX (33869).  Help, hope and healing begin here!

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